Wild Oats

I was out for dinner last night with S, my Canadian-english-teacher sometime-dinner companion listening to her detailing (in great detail) her utter inability to find guys interesting enough to date in Singapore, perhaps it's coming time for her to escape to europe to find a bloke to settle down with.

She's even (horror of horrors) tried speed dating just the once, which was (to put it mildly) disastrous...

Apparently speed dating in Singapore (wouldn't know, haven't reached that stage yet. laugh) is all about getting married, with all the frills removed. The boys circle around regurgitating the same spiel over-and-over-again (Hi, I'm stan, and I'm an accountant. I'm thirty seven and I have a stable income, and I'd like to marry you and have 2.4 children. Or something) and the girls just sit there soaking it up.

So predictably Sterile and typically Singaporean, even if the hosting companies have nice names like Lunch Actually (ha. ha. roll eyes.) So something I would never ever want to even contemplate trying for fun, because, well it doesn't sound even remotely funny.

It was then, as I was fiddling with a claw and a nutcracker (hmm. Freudian association?) that the idea hit me...

*****
The usual setup, five to ten couples at tables, but with arbitrators playing "referee".

The first three minutes reserved for participants to introduce themselves, the usual crap.

But here's the catch - no truths allowed.

Based on a fixed template, perhaps name, occupation, pets, hobbies, ambitions (whatever. shrug.) but the arbitrator comes armed with a pre-submitted resume from each participant, with The Truth on it.

If either participant is caught telling a truth, they get buzzed out and disqualified; moreover if they repeat stories at later tables, they get buzzed and penalized or disqualified, meaning they'd have to wing it and create five to ten stories on the spot. Well worth a laugh.

(Hello, my name is Alan Soh. Alan Soh-khool. I own a small business importing rodents and turning them into fur coats. I'm thirty nine this year and I have a pet pug called Starsky, and a cat named... Flipper. My hobbies include windsurfing and watching pet rescue on television. If I had a chance to bring you out on a date, I'd take you to a certain bar I know and play the piano for you. blahblablah)

After the three minutes (should be enough time for a short intro on both sides and a few quick questions) the arbitrator paints a scenario - you're a law clerk and you're her boss, it's late at the office and everybody else has gone home, there's a photocopier just... here... ok... Go.

After about two minutes of this the arbitrator shouts Switch! Do it in the style of.... slapstick / film noir / soap opera / opera / mime / porno etcetc and the two have to do it all over again, in a different style.

so 3 + 2 + 2 = 7 minutes per couple, then they have to rate each other on certain categories (humour, creativity, charm, looks, whatever).

Participants declare their "threshold" before the game starts above which they'd be amenable to a date, so if both participants rate each other high enough to pass their thresholds they get each others real names and numbers at the end of the night, if both fail, screw it, and if one passes and one fails, perhaps a grudge rematch.

Rotating around say ten couples should take 70 minutes, give or take about 30 min for delays, maybe 2 hours total.

Free starter drink before the game stars, to help dis-inhibit everyone a little; subsequent drinks paid for, and all proceedings to cover the cost of the drinks and tip the bartenders.

What I need is feedback, ideas, and men. (ok that came out so wrong. What I meant to say is that I've pinged the idea off several females now and have two, perhaps three confirmed lovely ladies interested in playing...)

Unfortunate

Master Yoda kicks Sith Lord's butt

Freewheeling

So this is me. The engine has stopped. The calls are done. The audit complete. This is me, alone. Knocking back bacardi cokes in the afternoon heat. Freewheeling. Freefalling.